Quantum Leap...into Trust

What the Fuck Was I thinking????


OMG!!!!  Yesterday I really got into a state of feeling so sad.  I swear, you would have thought I was grieving the death of a loved one!!!  I was heavy hearted, and boy, I sure wished I could have just mustered the ability to cry and be done with the feeling...but no tears swelled in these eyes!!!


So, here was where I was at.  I'm "mentally" thinking that I am probably going to have to move out of my apartment (by the way, I love being here...that's another story...), hopefully have time to pack everything in storage, and move into my parents home.  I'm sadden by the fact that my manifesting abilities didn't seem to pan out...know what I mean???  I started feeling like a total failure and LOSER!!!  I'm checking my email to see if anyone has responded to any of the gazillion resumes I've sent out..and NOTHING...just spam asking me if I want to enlarge my penis. 


It was sometime in the weee hours of the morning...feeling this incredible energy engulf my body...when I heard that "inner voice" that said, "wait, wait...TRUST TRUST TRUST YOURSELF!!!"  Then without words, I got that KNOWING.  You know that knowing that you just "know", but can't explain to another?


So, first of all, I don't have a sign on my door yet to get the hell out!  So, until then, I'm going to enjoy every minute I am still here.  Run around in my underwear, watch tv or get on the internet while laying on the couch!!!  Having a smoke on the patio in the middle of the night listening to the owls hoot, and occasionally seeing the magnificent moon.


I have asked to engage in work that will bring me happiness!!  Ok, so that may not be apparent yet in my exterior...but there is always the potential that by letting go of the past, including where I am currently residing, will open up the potentials to fullfill that desire.  I have to trust, that I know what the hell I am doing...TRUST.


I have also expressed and smile how I love where I am currently residing.  I have to remember that those feelings of security, happiness, comfort and well being will be attracted...It's Universal Law!!!  So as long as I don't lose touch with those feelings, no matter where I go...it will follow!


I may not know the outcome yet to all this...but I have to TRUST that all has been resolved...and be at peace that the outcome will serve the good of all...take the Quantum Leap of Trust.


So, I am once again at peace with my manifesting skills...remembering to expect the unexpected and not place any controls or definitions to an outcome.  I woke up this morning with a great smile...and finished the morning with much laughter from this great link...the laughter is totally worth living for..


GET HAPPY!!!  All is in divine order.





Much love to you Dear Humanity, and those assisting from the Other Side...


Carol
xoxoxoxo

Encouraging Words...to Self!

I received this card several times in the past few weeks.  I read it, and would somewhat dismiss it with the usual "yeah, yeah..I'm compassionate" and followed with the "what does it mean not to be hard on myself...I am not...".  When I got this card again today, after briefly skimming and doing the yeah, yeah, yeah...I decided to really read it, and I got that "life flashed in a split second" kind of event and recent experiences came into the forefront of my thoughts.

As the images flashed and formed, and dissolved, the feelings that triggered during the recent experiences danced within for awareness and movement once again.  Feeling again the somewhat disappointment, lack of enthusiasm, doubt, and settling into tapping into the intuition..then questioning it!!!

I realized as relationships have moved on, those once close have chosen differant paths and fallen away...I am left standing with me, myself, and I..  No one really left who I had become dependent on in the past to share my dreams, ideas, concerns,...those that once knew me well enough to validate my intuitive moments, to send out an encouraging word towards my weird ideas or extravagant dreams..you know, just someone for a moment of upliftment to keep riding on cloud 9.That compassionate sharing that was extended.

Yet, throughout this whole process I have continued to express upliftment to others I come in contact with.  Trying to be as postive as I can.  Share my own stories for encouragement as that example that anything in life is indeed possible.  Sending out encouraging words with a loving embrace. Extending my compassion and understanding to those I may come in contact with.  But as I've spent a lifetime encouraging others, and now stand alone on my unique path, I have now become aware, that the Quan Yin card is indeed accurate...for I have not been being my own upliftment, my own compassionate being, my own validator of intuition and standing in trust of Self.

Very, very interesting...I have always been a go getter...very independent, and considered myself a person who lacks the word failure generally from my vocabulary...but with this revelation I can see where I can raise myself to another level.  I smile as I give myself an energetic embrace of my own deepest love, like I can love no other but Self.


xoxoxo